Ok here’s the good news, all the actors are just fine, they all look like they are just having a blast making this. Here’s the bad news, the movie is just ok. And poor Johnny Depp, he tries so hard for us to like him and he succeeds here all debonair and charm having a wonderful time overacting and over doing his fake British accent. Along for the ride is amazingly sexy wife, Johanna, (Gwyneth Paltrow) womanizing man-servant/bodyguard, Jock, (Paul Bettany) while being pursed by a voluptuous nymphomaniac (Oliva Munn) who’s hot for a stolen painting and a cunning MI-5 agent (Ewan McGregor) who’s hot for his wife.
All sounds good and fun right, well it does but the execution of this confusing and bland plot just isn’t as fun as its talent seems to be having. It’s all sort of been there done that and then you have the jokes. They’re a bunch of bad old British-stereotypes and phrases that have been done so many times you’d swear the screenwriters must have stolen some of Benny Hill’s scripts. And of course what’s any British comedy without a poke or two at America or L.A. to be exact. Of course every woman in L.A. has to come right out of Playboy right? SIGH
And then you have Johnny Depp’s mustache. Ok, ok, for the love of it all ok, we get it that’s funny, the first time, the second time it’s cute, the third time it’s……PLEASE MOVE ON!!! And of course the lovely Mrs. Paltrow, who I won’t lie I love, but here is reduced to making a vomit joke because of the mustache. How the mighty have fallen, Mrs. Paltrow has gone from “Sliding Doors,” “Seven,” & “Shakespeare in Love” to making vomit jokes. She better get Mr. Downey back for another “Ironman” before it’s too late!
But again it’s not the talent, Depp, Paltrow, Bettany, McGregor and Munn are all appearing to have a wonderful time adlibbing and goofing off as they go along. Just too bad they can’t do it in a better film. To think Mr. Depp after this has down three bad movies in a row! Poor guy.
By: Jason Greathouse
2 out of 5 stars