Jupiter Ascending Review!
Wow, I had to be honest, when I saw the ads for this film and hearing that the Wachowski’s were back to making big grandiose film making with the possibility of a new trilogy. Well, that’s why I think it hurts so much to know the movie is just, well, maybe, ok. I mean visually it’s impressive as their camera zips and zooms, just check out an action/chase scene over the skyline of Chicago with huge c.g.i. visuals destined to jaw drop and impress. Everything else is just a mess. Basically the plot Mila Kunis is the genetic heir to a galactic fortune, I think, why I don’t know? But she get’s protected by a genetically enhanced solider, sort of, in the form of Channing Tatum, who finds her by, sense of smell, no joke. The rest, I don’t know? I’m still trying to figure that out?
The plot, the story, I have no idea I got lost myself. Poor Wachowski’s they really, really, really try to entertain us so badly. I mean they can do it, we’ve seen it, check out the underrated “Bound” and, of course, “The Matrix” a sci-fi action/thriller that raised the bar for all. And the political satire with a message thriller/drama “V for Vendetta,” which ok they’re not credited as director, but it was still their baby. These two can deliver when they want but I guess they want to just over impress us so much that it’s just overdone. I mean “The Matrix” sequels (“Matrix Reloaded” & “Matrix Revolutions”) were just eye rolling, blah, “Speed Racer” was an attempted kiddie flick that just made its target audience go, huh? Then let’s not forget their attempt at “indie” filmmaking, and I use that term loosely to describe “Cloud Atlas,” which I can respect the ambition but should have come with cliff notes because I got lost in just 10 minutes and needed a pause and rewind button just to follow who was who.
All in all the movie is like I said, visually stunning but that doesn’t excuse, boring characters and a plot/story that NOBODY can follow. Again, poor Wachowski siblings. And to think they needed a 175 million dollar budget to make people roll their eyes yet again in disbelief. The two of them better go back to the drawing board and try, oh please, please, please try to make something normal before it’s too late. Believe me, I still haven’t lost faith.
2 out of 5 stars
Written by Jason Greathouse